Judge not lest thou be judged? Not!
Regina Murphy
Originally published 02:35 p.m., May 21, 2008
Updated 02:35 p.m., May 21, 2008
Tell it to the world: Andy and I are certified Kansas City Barbecue Society judges!
We had our “baptism by fire” May 10 at the 10th annual Sertoma 48 BarBQ competition in Lawrence.
Forty-eight barbecue teams from across the region competed in four categories: chicken, ribs, pork and brisket. There also was a “People’s Choice” taste tent and the proceeds went to support Sertoma charities.
Half the fun of a barbecue competition is looking at everyone’s set-up. The cooking rig, the prep tent, the party area. The team names are also a source of entertainment: Sweet Old Buzzards, Bare Bones BBQ, The Pickled Pig, Rub Me Tender, and — yes — Big “D” and the Briquettes.
A team may be a husband and wife with the occasional teenager or grandchild, or a group of 30 or 40 people. You can have a simple canopy and “Smokey Joe”, or you can have the portable patio with space heaters, motor home, outdoor hot and cold water sink, and a barbecue rig that requires a hemi to haul it. Oh yeah!
These cooks are a dedicated lot. At the Sertoma 48, it was cold, wet and very windy, but that didn’t stop the smoking. Some cuts of meat may need to cook for 12 or 15 hours, with a constant vigil on temperature levels and moisture. A barbecue all-nighter.
When it’s time to compete, the teams present their best offering in a plastic foam box and rush them to the judging station. Many wrap their entries in heat-retaining bags or snuggle blankets, to try and keep the meat at an optimum temperature.
Contest organizers renumber the entries and pass them on to a Table Captain, who may again renumber the entries. This way the tasting is absolutely blind and judges can’t be swayed by knowing who did the cooking. Next, the Table Captain presents the entries to the judges, all of who vote in a standardized way on Appearance, Taste, Texture and Tenderness. The votes are tallied, a group consensus is reached and points are awarded. There’s a winner in each category, then an overall Showcase winner for the entire competition.
Our Table Captain was Shawn Leikam, and he did a great job. He checked for any rule infractions before presenting the entries, and made sure each judge got a good look from different angles. You may think one plate of barbecue looks just like another, but it doesn’t! Some can seem pale, while others look burned and others are swimming in so much curly parsley you can’t see the meat.
Then, each judge takes a piece and we put it on our special KCBS place mats. Once we have the six entries, we start tasting, and slurping, and licking our fingers. You’re so glad that everyone is concentrating on the food and not looking at how much barbecue sauce you have on your chin! Once all the entries are turned in, then you get to discuss what you’ve tasted and learn from all your fellow judges.
I was very fortunate to be seated next to a member of the nationally recognized barbecue duo, Pig Newton. Mike and Betty Castaneda live in the Kansas City metroplex, and they’ve been barbecuing for over 15 years. In 2001 they won the American Royal. In 2004 they were invited to the “Best of the Best” National Barbecue Competition, and were even featured on the Food Network. What fun!
Betty had a lot to say about different cooking techniques and the spices we were tasting in the rubs and sauces. She also had some great stories to share about the various cook-offs she and her husband have been to over the years. The Castanedas do about 16 competitions each season, and are holding their own by placing in the Top 10 in every KCBS sanctioned cook-off thus far in 2008.
The Kansas City Barbecue Society has been conducting classes to help both competitors and judges, and to ensure an equal footing for everyone in the judging process. There are a lot of rules and ethics to be aware of, and we even take an oath to do our best and be fair, “... so that truth, justice, excellence in barbecue and the American Way of Life may be strengthened and preserved forever.” Amen!
According to the rules, a chicken has to be cooked through, but not dry. It can be tricky since smoked chicken may look pink, even though it’s done. Also, it’s easy for cooks to let the sauce overwhelm the taste of the meat, and you can’t be distracted by it.
Pork can be sliced or pulled, and be bone meat or burnt ends, but it can’t be tough, mushy, dry or swimming in sauce. And no red lettuce garnishes either!
Ribs (my favorite) are considered perfect if they pull away from the bone with each bite, and the moisture on the bone quickly evaporates. However, if one bite pulls all the meat off a dry bone, or if even picking it up dislodges the flesh, you are looking at an overcooked rib. If you have to gnaw on it, the chef is in trouble.
Brisket is a lot of fun to test: you pull on the slice like a slinky toy! If it breaks, or has no flexibility, it’s not perfect. You ignore the smoke ring, too, since it can be produced chemically.
So much to know! So many bites to take! By the end of the Sertoma 48 I think I had ingested close to three pounds of meat over an hour and a half. Ouch. It was a hard job, but somebody had to do it. I felt desperate for something cruciferous.
To learn more about the KCBS, go to their web site at www.kcbs.us. There are plenty of local competitions, including “Smoke in the Spring” last month, “Wild Blue” in Burlington in July, and the two in Emporia in August: Greater Emporia BBQ and Beef Fest Blues & BBQ.
I don’t want to leave you without at least one recipe, so here’s a simple barbecue sauce to try. It just makes a little bit. Let’s get cooking!
SIMPLE BARBECUE SAUCE
1/4 cup canned tomato sauce
1 Tbsp. tomato paste
1 Tbsp. brown sugar
2 tsp. cider vinegar
1 tsp. minced garlic
Dash of Worcestershire sauce
Mix well and enjoy.