Pregnancy pact
Kenda O’Mara, Project TEEN Coordinator, Flint Hills Community Health Center
Originally published 08:58 a.m., June 28, 2008
Updated 08:58 a.m., June 28, 2008
The latest headline has thrust teen pregnancy back into media scrutiny. Ironically, this is the same media that relays a continuous stream of sexualized images of women and girls. A media that tells youth in more than a hundred different ways that everyone is and should be having sex.
Now, many are horrified that 17 young girls in a Gloucester Massachusetts high school have seemingly banded together in a “pregnancy pact” to raise their babies together. Internet news sites are buzzing with comments from people screaming “what is wrong with our kids?”
As coordinator for Project TEEN, I am at schools nearly every day talking to Lyon and Chase County youth, grades 5-12, about sex, relationships, and the struggles teens face in battling sex pressure. Often I ask the question to classes, “why are some teens having sex?” Here are a few answers I hear:
Because everyone else is
Because I want to keep my boyfriend
Because nobody has ever told me not to
Because nobody is ever home at my house
Because I was bored and curious
Because I want to feel loved
Although many would never admit it, teens want parental guidance and input about sex. We can’t fail our children by avoiding these critical discussions regarding issues like pre-marital sex, boundaries when dating, oral sex, relationships and contraception.
Starting a dialogue may be something like, “What are some of the kids in your class thinking or talking about in relation to sex?” or “What kinds of things have you learned in school about sex?” Make it a casual conversation, during regular activities. If we don’t start setting examples and boundaries for our kids regarding sex, they will take every example our media offers them.