Horsin’ Around
Don Coldsmith, Syndicated Columnist
Originally published 02:18 p.m., June 2, 2008
Updated 02:18 p.m., June 2, 2008
I need a haircut and I’ll get one, one of these days. But while I was thinking about it, it occurred to me that hair styles, particularly those of men and boys, provide a unique look at our culture, as well as proof of our absolute idiocy.
Traditionally, men have laughed at the devotion of women to what’s current in “style.” But look at old photographs, high school yearbooks, historical pictures. The slaves to fashion in hair styles have been the men. A year or two out of date, and a man appears ridiculous.
Our founding fathers are usually depicted in powdered wigs. That was for formal occasions, of course. I don’t know what they might have worn around the house on weekends. How would you decide whether to wear your wig or not? What kind of haircut did they wear under it? And Ben Franklin, who apparently DIDN’T wear a powdered wig. He was bald on top and had shoulder length hair around the sides and back. (Now there’s an interesting combination). Powdered wigs were out of style pretty quickly anyway. That was too British for the new nation. Judges, attorneys and lawmakers STILL wear powdered wigs in England, possibly to conceal their identity, I suppose.
Early photographs of frontier figures such as Wild Bill Hickock indicate that many of them wore shoulder-length hair. George Custer is always depicted that way. (I’ve read that he was NOT scalped at the Little Big Horn fiasco. Some said that it was out of respect and honor, but it was probably because he was bald on top, like Ben Franklin.)
Speaking of scalps, there were a variety of hair styles among American Indians. Several nations shaved the side and left a roach up the middle, now called “Mohawk.” The Indian hand sign for that haircut, though means “Osage.” Pawnees shaved the whole head except for a four-inch circle on the top front. This was allowed to grow long, waxed with tallow and paint and coiled up into a horn-shaped ornament. Charles Rivois, a Piegan, reported that a Pawnee was “the easiest of all to scalp.”
Back to our own follies, when I was small, boys’ hair was parted in the middle and combed to the sides. A little later, it could be parted on one side or the other and the larger side combed BACK.
Then came World War II and the military “crew-cut,” about an inch long on top and short on the sides. It was comfortable, took little care and looked pretty good. After the war, it was around for a while, evolving into the “butch” and the flat-top. A spinoff from this was a line of waxes to hold the short hair in an upright stance.
When the Beatles from England came on the scene, they had long shaggy hair and were quite repulsive to most of that generation. It helped them get a lot of attention, though. It’s quite remarkable to see how clean-cut and well-groomed they look by today’s standards. (Actually, I think there are no “standards”).
Some of the odd aberrations now defy description. The spikes and odd dyeing jobs — shaving designs and obscenities across the back or one side — one side long, the other shaved.
More discreet but equally idiotic was the onset, a few years back, of a fairly decent haircut, but with one little string in back left long, sticking down the collar. (Ever want to sneak up and clip off that little wisp?)
Shaving it all off seems to be gaining popularity, especially in sports. Well, that makes sense. You shampoo your hair with a wash cloth. On women who have to do that to get attention, I’m not so sure. There must be a better way. Possible even talent and hard work.
Well, it’s fun to watch. Oh, yes — I heard recently that a porcupine is simply a possum with an attitude and a bad-hair day.
Makes sense.
See you down the road.
Author and columnist Don Coldsmith lives in Emporia.
Bjnemp (anonymous) says...
Thank you, Don. Your contributions are always entertaining and informative.
June 2, 2008 at 2:31 p.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
sexingthecherry (anonymous) says...
I think you should consider the fact that women don't get short haircuts for attention. They usually do so because they like the way short hair looks--the same reason men get short haircuts.
June 2, 2008 at 3:15 p.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
jayhawker (anonymous) says...
Another good article, Don. Thanks.
June 2, 2008 at 3:19 p.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
srochat (Scott Rochat) says...
A good piece, Don. It's funny -- even in the early days of America, people were complaining about changing hair styles.
At one time, prominent men used to wear their hair in a "queue" -- i.e., a braid -- but the conservative Federalists wore them big and thick, while the Democratic-Republicans wore a thin braid when they wore one at all. In 1808, one barber bemoaned "this little Jim Madison, with a queue no bigger than a pipe-stem! Sir, it is enough to make a man foreswear his country!"
June 2, 2008 at 6:34 p.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
sexingthecherry (anonymous) says...
No, not all women. I said "usually." I would say that most people, not just women, make decisions on their appearance, hair or otherwise, based on what they like and what they believe looks good on them. NOT for attention. To say that women cut their hair short for attention any more than men do is just silly.
June 3, 2008 at 9:11 a.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )