National Expert gives advice on protecting children
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
One of the country’s foremost authorities in protecting children spoke at a public meeting here Monday night before presenting training today for law enforcement officers from around the state.
“I’m here for one thing and that is because we feel that no child should be at-risk in this country,” said Craig Hill, former deputy chief of police at Leawood and current national director of crime prevention training for the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children.
“The issue that really changed my life happened on a cold winter day in January 1983,” he said, as he recalled returning to the station after working with the Metro Squad in the Kansas City area.
“As we pulled into police headquarters, one simple telephone call changed my life forever,” he said, clicking a control button that replayed the call to 911 for the audience.
“I’m only going to say this once,” a man’s voice said, telling the dispatcher that a girl could be found between Interstate 35 and State Line Road.
Hill later learned that the girl, Carolyn, had been sent by her nanny to a grocery store down the street to buy a couple of onions for a pot of chili. It was still light outside, and Carolyn was walking on a neighborhood sidewalk during rush-hour traffic. She seemed safe.
A car pulled into a driveway, blocked the sidewalk and the driver stopped Carolyn to ask how he could get to Country Club Plaza. She did what children are taught to do, Hill said; she was polite and answered his questions.
The man told her that he couldn’t hear her directions and asked her to move closer. Soon, he asked her to show him the route on his map.
“She got close to the car to look at the map, he grabbed her by the shirt and drove to an abandoned airport,” Hill said.
After assaulting her and using panty hose to strangle her, he left her on a piece of plywood, drove to a phone booth and called police.
The man had not completed the job, though, and when Carolyn regained consciousness, she walked until she found help and was taken to the hospital.
“When I interviewed Carolyn, I was devastated by what she showed on her face and what she lived through,” Hill said. “At that point in my life I decided I needed to do something else to protect the community.”
He and other officers formed the Lost Child Network, which later merged with the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children.
Statistics show that about 2,100 children are reported missing every day. Approximately 200,000 children are taken each year by family members and 58,000 are victims of non-family abductions. Most of them are found within hours.
But an average of 115 of them are murdered.
Teaching basic safety rules is essential to protecting children, whether they are dealing with dangers at home or on the Internet. How parents and guardians react is crucial.
Hill said parents may be reluctant to call police when a child is late coming home.
“But keep in mind, if that child is in trouble and you don’t take the effort to make that call to law enforcement ... Moms, dads, trust those instincts,” he said. “Don’t call every one of his friends. Looking for him at their house wastes that precious time.”
With the inception of Amber Alert, it is easier for police and for the public to find a missing child.
Hill said parents need to teach their children “real-world safety,” to be aware of potential dangers and develop safety skills.
Prevention is the key, he said, and that involves communication.
“Your child needs to check in with you and you need to check in with them,” he said. “... Not being involved in your kids’ activities gives somebody else the ability to step in and take your place. ... Don’t give them the opportunity.”
He said to teach children to go away from danger, never toward it.
“Danger is anyone that invades their personal space or makes them feel scared, uncomfortable, or confused,” Hill said. “Teach them to scream or make a scene and make every effort to get away. Safety is more important than being polite.”
Hill provided safety rules for parents and children.
For children:
— Do not accept gifts from people without parents’ knowledge.
— When unknown adults stop to ask questions, get away.
— If there is a family emergency, a parent will not send a stranger to pick up a child. Decline the offer and go immediately to a phone to call parents.
— Never approach a car if a stranger stops to ask questions.
— Never converse with anyone you do not know and trust.
— Get parents’ permission to go anywhere other than where you are supposed to go.
— Do not answer the door when parents are not home.
— Do not answer the phone when parents are not home, unless you know how to use caller ID.
— Do not accept rides from anyone without parents’ knowledge, including friends.
For parents:
— Never leave a child alone in a car, running or not.
— Don’t put names on backs of uniforms or clothing.
— Talk openly to children about safety and encourage them to tell you or an adult they trust if anyone or anything makes them scared, uncomfortable or confused.
— Use what-if scenarios to prepare them if they get lost while shopping, approached walking to and from school or at the mall or park.
“Don’t ever go with anyone without asking first,” he said. “I don’t care if it’s a church counselor or a teacher. They’re not to accept rides from anybody without you knowing about it.
“The No. 1 place a predator’s going to take a position is where?” Hill asked the audience before answering himself, “In a church, because he’s going to be sheltered the best (there).”
Hill said children should be aware that the offer of money to help an adult is a danger sign.
Some predators use fake police badges to gain cooperation from children. Hill said children need to say they have to notify their parents and will meet police at the police station later.
Daycare providers and babysitters need to be checked beyond personal references.
It is important to listen to children about places they don’t want to go and people they don’t want to see, including adult friends and family. And children need to know they have rights.
“They have the right to say no, to get away, to tell you immediately,” Hill said. “Trust their instincts.”
He said parents need to keep vital information about their children close at hand in case of an abduction.
“Know what your child is wearing when he walks out the door in the morning,” Hill said.
Hill also dealt with Internet safety.
“A chatroom is probably the most dangerous place on the Internet,” he said. “You absolutely do not know who’s on the other end. ... For a child sex offender’s purposes, it is probably the most effective tool ever invented.”
Parents need to set rules for Internet use, educate themselves on ways to block certain web sites, and educate their children never to put on photographs or information that makes them easy to find. Information about those topics may be found on the United States Postal Service and the NCMEC web sites.
And children need to know that they should never meet with an Internet acquaintance by themselves; parents need to be involved.